HOME SICKENING
Maryah
Nathan had restored a sense of home to me. I felt nostalgic driving around Sedona. The white leather seats sticking to the back of my legs didn’t even bother me like they used to. Even my hip and shoulder felt better. However, River was a killjoy.
“You don’t think it’s odd that he gave you a car on Valentine’s Day?”
I shrugged. “It's not like he bought me a car. He got it back from the guy who bought it from my uncle.” A heartfelt apology probably would have done the job, but Nathan blew me away with his thoughtfulness.
“He so wants in your pants.”
“It’s not like that! We have really bad history. He wanted to make up for being a jerk. If you keep harping on it, I’ll kick you out at the next red light!”
“You wouldn’t.”
“Try me.”
I was so annoyed by how River acted in front of Nathan. Asking me about the necklace I didn’t even want, and flinging those roses around like he was some kind of Romeo. “And what’s with the babe thing? I don’t like being called babe.”
He rolled his eyes.
What made me even madder was that before River showed up, I had been questioning if Nathan Luna, hottest guy on the planet—and maybe not as insane as I originally thought—could be interested in someone like me. The candles definitely seemed…romantic. He even held onto me a little longer than normal when I hugged him. It might’ve been wishful thinking, but he kept looking at me a certain way, like rays from an emerald sun were struggling to shine through his eyes. I prayed—as impossible as it seemed—that maybe I played some part in replacing his sad darkness with the happy sunrise I saw inside of him.
River slid closer to me. “So what about us? Are we officially an item or what?”
“This is my night to be reconnected to my family. We can discuss you and me tomorrow.”
He gave one last angry huff before shutting up.
When we got back to the house, River got in his car and left, and I ran inside to thank Nathan again. Carson sat alone on the couch looking pissed off.
“Hey, where’s your brother?”
“Gone.”
“Gone where?”
“Back to Colorado.”
“But he just got here.” He must have driven the Desoto here, so how would he get back to Colorado? “Was he flying back?”
“No, he caught a ride on a meteor.”
My heart sank. Not because of Carson’s stupid star obsession, but because Nathan didn’t mention he’d be leaving right away, and he didn’t care enough to say goodbye to me, which meant, of course, I had imagined his interest in me. No big shocker there. The car thing was truly about keeping peace with the family. “I wish I could’ve said goodbye.”
Carson avoided eye contact.
“Are you mad at me?” I asked.
“Nope.”
“Are you upset about something?”
“Nope.”
“Thank you again for saving my life today. I’d say I owe you one, but I’m not sure I’d ever be able to pay you back for something like that.”
He grunted.
Back to cold shoulder status. Great. “Okay, well…guess I’ll go to bed.”
Not a word. I thought we’d had a real bonding moment out on the cliffs, but now he seemed to hate me all over again. I’d never figure him out.
I went to my room and called Krista to tell her about the Desoto. I left out the River situation because I still wasn’t sure how I felt. I used to tell Krista everything, but since the Christmas incident I didn’t know where I stood with her—or with anyone.
I showered all the dirt off me and went to bed.
Carson’s arctic attitude and the River soap opera were stressing me out, but it all paled in comparison to the thrill of having my parents’ car back. I got excited when Nathan appeared in my dreams.
At first, it was an incredible dream. We were flying through a star-filled sky. Snow-covered mountains whizzed by us at what felt like a hundred miles per hour, but exhilaration turned to worry when we landed.
Nathan disappeared just before he hit the ground. Then he reappeared, standing a few inches away from me and fell to his knees. He held his face in his hands like he was in pain. I bent over him and ran my hands over his head, wanting to make sure he was okay. But I didn’t feel hair; I only felt tingling warmth against my invisible fingers.
“This can’t be happening,” he moaned. He shook his head over and over again, pressing his hands over his eyes. “I can’t take anymore.”
He sounded so defeated. My non-existent hands traveled down his wide shoulders. When he looked up, he let out a gut-wrenching scream that sent me jumping backward. He ripped the headphones from his ears and threw his iPod.
It went right through the place where my heart was supposed to be.
∞
In the morning, I walked into the kitchen and discovered Faith doing laps around the island.
“You’re early,” I said dryly.
“Are you and River an item, and I somehow don’t know about it?”
I frowned, searching for a way to explain. “Not exactly.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means I don’t think I like him like that.”
Faith’s expression softened. “You deserve better than him.” She grabbed a package from her bag then slid it across the counter to me. “Here, the other part of your gift from Nathan.”
“What?” I unwrapped a black Gatsby style hat. Green, blue, and white crystals formed a peacock feather along the brim, a silver peacock charm dangled off the green satin banding. “What's with the peacock fascination?”
Faith shrugged then stuffed a nectarine into her messenger bag. “He heard you lost Mikey’s hat in your heavyweight match with April, so he got you a new one. At least this one is pretty.”
“How did you get it?”
“Um.” Her gaze shot to the ceiling. “I drove him to the airport. He said you ran off with the wretched wannabe before he could give it to you.” She grabbed a bottle of juice from the fridge. “You ready?”
Speaking of wretched. “Where’s Harmony?”
“She’s taking a day off. She didn’t get much sleep last night.”
I asked to be polite, but I honestly didn’t care. Her ominous disposition and permanent pissed-offness unnerved me. Knowing I had to have “the talk” with River made this day awkward enough already. My new hat would come in handy. I could hide under it.
∞
I managed to put off the inevitable until school ended, but dragonflies buzzed in my stomach as River and I walked to his car. He was in his seat and looking at me before I even closed my door. I’d run out of excuses.
“Nice hat,” he said.
“Thanks.”
He drummed on the steering wheel. “Kind of messed up that you’re not wearing the necklace I gave you.”
“Flashy bling isn’t my style.”
He slammed his palm against the center console, startling me. “Nothing I do makes you happy, does it?”
“That’s not true it’s just—”
“Because it’s not a car like Numbnuts gave you, it’s not good enough?”
“What? No. I never said that.” Suddenly River’s car felt like the desert. I put my window down to let in some air. “I don’t want to ruin our friendship, and April is my friend. I can’t hurt her like that.”
“She kicked your ass!”
“Hey, I held my own!” I unconsciously touched my cheek where a bruise remained for a week after our fight. “The thing is, I didn’t have a lot of friends in Maryland, and this dating thing is new to me, but I’ve seen it end badly. Look at you and April. You won’t even say “hi” to her. And she won’t talk to me. I don’t want to lose both of you.”
River leaned closer. His leather seat squeaked under his weight. “Maryah, I want you. Now tell me, what do you want?”
I should’ve felt a surge of excitement because the most popular guy at school just said he wanted me—again—but instead, all I felt was my nose burning from the lemon-scented air freshener.
River sighed and tugged at his wristband. “What if I promise that no matter what happens, you and I stay friends? Until death do us part or whatever. We take it slow and see if we’re meant to be. Because we are, and I want to spoil you rotten.” He leaned across the seat, cocking his head to the side.
No one had ever tried to kiss me before, but I assumed that’s what he was doing. I moved so far away from him that my hair hung out the window. I needed to say something to get him back to his side of the car. “You said you’d give me time to think about it.”
He brushed a finger along my arm then kissed my hand. “Fine, but wear the necklace. You deserve nice things.”
I breathed a sigh of relief when he moved away from me. He revved his engine and pulled out of the parking lot. “I know you’ll make the right decision.”
I pulled down the brim of my hat over my eyes and stared out the window. For the entire ride home, all I could think about was Nathan.
